Saturday, 20 November 2010

Shark films and documentaries

This has nothing to do with property but it's entertaining.

This is my favourite shark film. I remember watching it when I was a kid and it was so real I thought they couldn't possibly have faked it and people really did get killed to make this film - they must have chopped a leg off someone to float it in the sea and someone got bitten in half by the shark. Other films I also thought were so real they couldn't possibly have faked it (when I was a child, of course) included Planet of the Apes, American Werewolf in London and Poltergeist. Yep, I did spend my childhood living in fear of being shipped off to ape planets, running into werewolves in central London and being sucked into TVs.

Shark Attack 4
I have not watched Shark Attack 1, 2, or 3 ( but I own the DVDs as they were bought as part of a 10 disc creature feature boxset). "Best film ever made" was one review I read of it. Sadly not true, but quite hard to beat when there is a scene where a man jet-skis into the mouth of a giant prehistoric shark. There is also a scene where people partying on a boat fall off it into the mouth of the shark (in cocktail party wear) in a 1970's-falling-into-a-black-hole style. If you don't know what I mean, either watch the film itself or one of those films where someone is sucked into a black hole in a whirling fashion.

Mega Shark vs Giant Octopus
The title of this film doesn't mess around and neither does the film itself. Best bit is when the mega shark jumps out of the sea and snatches the plane between its teeth. Yee-eah!

Deep Blue Sea
Very entertaining film and I don't understand why they haven't made a sequel (or rather my husband doesn't understand why). The only annoying thing is the lady doctor who would rather protect these intelligence-enhanced sharks to harvest their brain cells to develop a cure for Alzheimer's disease than want to save the people around her that were eaten up by the sharks. But I like the cook and his parrot.

Shark documentary about shark attacks re-enacted using models
This is one of the most bizarre things I have watched. There is a shark researcher (I forget his name, but I am not making this up) who goes around interviewing shark attack victims and then re-enacts the experience with a little mannequin, the wooden ones with articulated joints that artists use, and a shark model. This is ridiculous in many ways. Firstly, the model of the shark he uses is half the size of the wooden mannequin, so yeah right, this is realistic. Then he "performs" the event with his models like a boy would if he was playing with action figures. The best bit is how this guy treats this as very serious research, when in fact all he is doing is waving a wooden figurine and a plastic shark toy around. One would have thought if they could afford to make a TV show about it they would surely beable to afford a more accurately scaled shark model.

I recently watched another shark documentary and this model man was in it. This time he was diving into waters with sharks without a cage. It introduced him as newly-wed (not sure what the relevance of that was) and showed him sitting on a boat with his wife holding hands. His wife worked with him and she also dived but was in a cage and took pictures. She was also interviewed and was prompted to gush about her husband (not sure what the relevance of that was either). Whilst they were interviewing him, or trying to, he kept diving back into the sea because the shark kept returning - wouldn't it have been easier to just stay in the water? This poor guy looked petrified. I don't think he wanted to do it but it looked like he was forcing himself to keep up with his peers as there are other shark researchers now who dive cage-free. Strangely entertaining to watch.

I have high hopes for Jaws 5.

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